Monthly Merits: February 2017

A Flatlay by Brunei Blogger May Cho of The Mayden

Monthly Merits is a monthly series where I recount and award the month's worthiest moments in merits. Read last month's merits here.

There never was any good in comparing something to another should it leave a person perplexed in the wrath of insecurity and despair. I cannot help as I type this, however, to put together the pieces of a year old month I have quickly torn apart and place it beside the February I have just had. The difference is striking; misery has become a toxic lover sent out on her knees.

I thank my lucky stars for a February filled with work, more work and even more work. Better a month of breathless smiles than one of idle cries. Here are this month's merits.

May Cho Brunei Blogger of The Mayden
Brunei Lifestyle Blogger May Cho of The Mayden with friends
#1 | AH, THEATRE!
I found myself right smack in the center of two theatre productions at the start of the semester last month, and February has been a long process of preparation for both. On one hand, I am both directing and acting, on the other hand, I am transcribing music and rehearsing with fellow musicians. I admit that patience has been running a little low lately, that tears have become regular companions and that late nights have not been infrequent, but the stress and endorphins have me on a dizzying high of a sense of accomplishment and I have been embracing it with open arms.

Both productions are happening at the end of March, so I expect to be preoccupied for the entirety of this month. Let's see how long I can hold on without falling apart. After all, once you reach the zenith, you gotta come back down. 

#2 | FATIGUE
School, rehearsals and events lead fairly and squarely to human interaction. A lot of human interaction. Excessive human interaction. And while I do agree that I have gained control of the ropes of socializing and can hold myself pretty well in conversations, what it costs takes triple the time to recuperate and time is not something I seem to have a lot of these days. Take that on top of 10 hour days of rehearsing and studying and finding spare time to fulfill schedules of pre-scheduled schedules and I am a sleep-deprived, aching and cranky university student.

My body is ridden with exhaustion and I recognize the state of fatigue I am entering into -- I have become a ticking time bomb that, at the slightest bend of my own established rationality, will combust into tears, despair and, I believe at times, flames. Definitely flames.

#3 | THE ROT WITHIN
Human interaction has not been all that bad, really. Aside from the fact that I knock myself out after I shut the doors to gleeful conversations peppered with innuendos and good spirit, I have been enjoying my time with people, classmates, friends.

I've also learnt a lot about myself this month because of people -- namely that I have a horrific tendency to patronize and condescend unconsciously, though I have to admit that this is something I am aware of already but it seems as though the rot has found a time to make itself seen and heard (also, trust me when I say that I have henceforth been actively working on it) -- and I'm eternally grateful.

Brunei Blogger May Cho of The Mayden with Model Phoebe Cho at L'Orient's First Anniversary Runway
Brunei Blogger May Cho with the Haus von Jimmy R team at L'Orient's First Anniversary Runway | Awangku Hadi, Azim 'Jimmy' Rosli, Phoebe Chok and Siddiqah Rosli
I wish I have more to add to the month of February, but it is what it is; a month of repetitive work that seem to be working towards a culmination, of which I hope will be in epic worth and proportion, this March. I am beyond exhausted but also beyond excited to see what the month has in store for me.

How was your February?

MAY X

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